Did things for the one who doesn't do things for me. Did nothing for the one who did everything for me.
We yearn for what we can't have ay?
Time to put my silliness to an end. I have screwed up in so many aspects this year.
School - One mod behind everyone. Didn't do well for Y2S2. And Y3S1, I'm just hoping for the best, & prolly should prepare for the worst. Tied down by marketing but didn't secure a single sponsor. Screwed my already bad image even more by looking more slut than ever.
Love - I do not wish to further elaborate. I made the wrong investment and now I'm bankrupt. Simple and straight to the point.
Family - Cold War with mom lasted almost a year. It's horrible.
Friendship - Probably the least screwed because those screwed up ones are those that I can live without. However I've also sort of sabotaged my friend unintentionally. It sucks.
Health - I am becoming fatter and fatter. I know I am not physically fat but body composition wise I am. Postural hypotension. Numbness in the extremities. Insomnia. All getting from bad to worse. I've never hated my body this much. I'm just a patchwork of tan lines, acne, fats and horrible things. Actually I think I may be psychologically unfit as well.
So many problems. I have to change them all by myself. Tell me how.
It's not that I don't have these problems last time but they don't happen all at the same time. So there's still something to love about myself. But now, no. Nothing's left to be loved.
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